Grey divorce refers to couples in their late forties, fifties, and beyond, who decide to separate after spending decades together. This growing trend is gaining attention not in urban India, where shifting social norms and changing expectations are reshaping the concept of personal happiness, even in the later stages of life.
Zulekha Shakoor Rajani, a psychologist at the Mind and Brain Hospital in Bengaluru explains the underlying factors driving the grey divorce trend.
Why are grey divorces on the rise?
According to psychologist Zulekha Shakoor Rajani, while each marriage is unique, couples experiencing grey divorce often face similar challenges and emotions. These include:
1. Rediscovering individuality
As children grow up and leave home, many couples are left facing the quiet of an empty house. This silence can lead to the realisation that they have grown apart over the years. This moment of self-discovery often sparks a desire to create new love maps.
2. Shifting priorities and desires
With longer life expectancies, couples often take time to reassess their goals and desires. For some, this reflection leads to a painful recognition that their lives have diverged, making it difficult to continue together.
3. Financial issues
Disagreements over finances, particularly around retirement savings and pensions, can create significant strain in long-term marriages. As couples approach retirement, financial pressures often exacerbate existing tensions, pushing them towards separation.
4. Infidelity and emotional strain
Over time, issues like infidelity, emotional neglect, and unresolved conflicts accumulate, leading to irreparable damage. For many, the emotional toll of staying together outweighs the potential for reconciliation.
5. Society’s perspective on divorce
Increasing financial independence, particularly among women, and the diminishing stigma surrounding divorce are allowing more individuals to seek happiness outside of unsatisfying marriages. This shift in societal perceptions has made it more acceptable to end relationships, regardless of age.
While Sehwag and Ahlawat’s separation highlights the reality of grey divorces, it also reflects broader shifts in attitudes toward marriage and personal fulfilment.
As society evolves, so too do the expectations around relationships, making it crucial for individuals to prioritise their happiness and well-being.
The rise of grey divorces marks the beginning of a new era where individuals are more willing to embrace new beginnings, even after many years together. This trend prompts important reflections on the dynamics of long-term relationships and the underlying factors that contribute to their eventual dissolution.